The ability to learn a second language is an invaluable skill that opens up new horizons, fosters cultural understanding and provides a competitive edge in our increasingly globalised world. Many parents ask themselves, ‘Can I teach my child a language as a non-native speaker?’ My answer would be a resounding, “Yes!”
Teaching a non-native second language to your child isn’t as daunting as it may seem, and it can be an incredibly rewarding journey for both you and your child. In this blog post, I will offer advice when it comes to teaching a foreign language to your child that isn’t your native language, and the numerous benefits that come with it. The advice I offer here is based on the experience I have gained from teaching foreign languages in secondary schools as well as teaching my own children French (non-native) over the last seven years.
The Benefits of Learning a Second Language
The benefits of raising bilingual children are numerous and well-documented. Bilingual kids often have better cognitive abilities, including problem-solving and multitasking skills. Learning different languages enhances brain development, providing a cognitive advantage. Moreover, bilingualism fosters cultural understanding and appreciation of different cultures, which is highly beneficial in today’s multicultural world. This Montessori Academy post outlines some of the main advantages of learning a second language as a young child:
Of course, learning a foreign language is also great fun! While many parents want to impart this skill to their children, non-native speakers may feel unsure about their ability to teach a language they didn’t grow up speaking themselves. There’s no doubt that it’s more challenging to teach a child a second language that isn’t a native language, and the child is less likely to develop true mastery and fluency at an early age compared to a child with a parent who is a native speaker. That said, teaching a child your second language even as a non-native speaker is still, in my opinion, completely worth the time and effort.
It Doesn’t Matter if They Don’t end up Bilingual
For me, when it comes to teaching a child a non-native second language, the adage about the journey being the important thing rather than the destination couldn’t be more true. While of course, parents with a second non-native foreign language would eventually love for their children to be able to converse fluently in the target language, even learning a small amount of the language to begin with can be hugely rewarding for both the parent and the child. The benefits of learning a second language are numerous and well-documented and it’s not really about achieving fluency as the end result (although of course that would be a fantastic bonus).
So, if you set out with the intention of teaching your child your non-native language, remember that it doesn’t matter if you don’t speak the language perfectly yourself. Any language you can pass on to your child will be beneficial to them, even if it doesn’t seem like much to you.
Starting Young: Language Learning in Early Childhood
The good news is that children have a remarkable capacity to absorb new languages, especially when exposed to them at a young age. Learning a new language is a bit like learning your first language; it’s all about exposure and practice. In the case of bilingual children, it’s common for them to pick up two languages effortlessly, with one being their first language or ‘mother tongue’ and the other being the target or second language. Anyone who has learned foreign languages will know that the earlier a child is exposed to the second language, the better. If a parent can decide to teach their child their second language (whether native or not) even before the child is born, and start speaking it to their newborn from the word go, that really is the best-case scenario.
I never learnt French as a child, but had the experience of being immersed in the language when I took a year out before going to study French at university. Ironically, French had been my weakest subject at A-level, and my worst grade of four subjects, which is why I decided to defer my place for a year. When I went to live with a host family in France and work in a school, I was amazed at how much easier it was to learn a language through immersion. The skill of listening was the first to develop. Gradually I understood more and more without having to ‘work’ at it, and one day after around six months, I woke up and realised I was speaking the language more or less fluently. I learned by osmosis, as a young child would, and while I would never master the accent and the grammar in quite the same way as a native speaker, my French was so good by the end of the year that I breezed through my university course and ended up teaching French to A-level at an academic school back in the UK.
I think it was the experience of learning the language so easily myself through immersion that inspired me to start speaking it to my newborn daughter, as well as the fact I didn’t want to lose my own French skills. So many people I studied with at university lost the fluency they gained simply because they never used it when they left. The idea of losing my own language skills when I went on maternity leave and stopped teaching it every day was incredibly depressing to me, and I simply couldn’t let that happen.
So, teaching your child your second language even if you’re not brilliantly fluent yourself isn’t only benefitting your child, it’s also an easy way of keeping your own skills going. You no doubt worked really hard for a long time to learn a second language, so it seems such a waste to let it all go to waste!
The First Year: Building Foundations and the Importance of Routine
In the first year of your child’s life, exposure is the key. Even if you’re not a fluent speaker of the target language, you can incorporate it into your child’s daily life. Use simple words and phrases in the second language, and fit them into your child’s daily routine. For example, you can say “hello” and “goodnight”, do the breakfast and bathtime routine, and sing nursery rhymes all in the target language. When you first start speaking in the target language to your baby (ideally this will be from the day they are born) it may feel a little strange. A parent’s brain is naturally wired to want to communicate with their child in their native language, so it can feel like a real struggle to begin with to force yourself to speak in your non-native language.
When things don’t come naturally to us, or things are hard to do, the best thing to do is try and do those things at the same times each day, until the brain considers it second nature and it starts to feel strange not doing it at those times. Fortunately, babies and young children generally have a pretty rigid routine, and many of these routines lend themselves extremely well to using the target language. Routine means repetition and repetition is key to learning a foreign language. Sing the same nursery rhymes while you’re changing their nappy or bathing your child, and repeat the same words and phrases when you’re getting them dressed or giving them their meals. They will soon associate these times of day with the target language and will happily absorb it all like a sponge.
Making the most of a newborn baby or baby in their first year of life who can’t talk yet is essential when teaching a child a foreign language. As my children got older, both of them went through phases of not wanting me to speak to them in French. While I persevered and we moved through those phases, it got much harder to stay in the target language with them once they were able to talk (and complain!) While I did try and speak in French to them daily when they were small babies, there’s no doubt that had I realised just what a sweet spot that was before they learned to talk in English, I would have made even more of an effort to stay in the target language as often as possible.
Don’t Put Too Much Pressure on Yourself: Stay Positive
While some people might manage it, from my experience it’s unrealistic to expect yourself to stay in the target language that isn’t your native language all of the time. It’s entirely natural that you want to communicate with your child in your native language. A good rule of thumb is to aim to talk to your baby or child at least some of the time every day. Even if you only manage three sentences in the target language on the days when you’re too busy or exhausted to remember to say more, that’s still great! Consistently using a language with your child that isn’t your native language isn’t an easy thing to do, and it’s commendable that you’re doing it at all. It’s much more motivating to pat yourself on the back for managing fifteen minutes of target language with your child than it is to constantly berate yourself for not doing enough. I will often say to myself, “I had a really hard day today and still managed to speak to them in French over breakfast. Hurrah!” A positive mentality and telling yourself how great it is you’re even attempting this, is one of the keys to success.
The Role of Creating a Bilingual Environment at Home
Environment plays a crucial role in a child’s language development. If you have a family member or friend who is a fluent speaker of the target language, their involvement can be a great way to maximise your child’s exposure to it. Not only does it take the pressure off the parent who is teaching the language, it’s really motivating for the child to see other people speaking the target language, especially people they know.
Additionally, surrounding your child with bilingual books and other resources such as television shows in the target language can be a huge help. Again, babies and very young children are much more receptive to the idea of foreign language books and television than older children who have already learned to talk in their native language. Picture books with no words are great for inspiring target-language talking.
Strike while the iron is hot! Expose your child to as many of these resources as you can before they realise what’s going on and start demanding that everything be in their native language. My kids honestly believed that Pepper Pig could only be played in French when they were little. Stand firm while they’re really little and have the majority (or even all) of their television time be in the target language. Netflix and Disney+ are my go-to streaming services for foreign language learning. They have an incredible number of kids’ programmes that can be changed into multiple languages and while streaming services aren’t cheap, the ability to watch foreign language shows makes them completely worth the money.
My children still watch kids’ programmes in French when I insist, although unfortunately not as often as they used to. As I said, it does get harder to maintain the routines and discipline of a foreign language environment in the home as they get older. However, I do know of parents who are native speakers of a foreign language living in the UK whose kids now completely refuse to watch any shows in the target language, so I tell myself I’m not doing too badly on this front…
I have also set up a WhatsApp group for French-speaking families in our area and we regularly meet up to speak the language together around our children. If you want to raise your child with a foreign language, you need to be proactive in creating as many authentic opportunities as possible to use that language (watching television in French counts as an authentic use of the language, by the way).
Encouraging Them to Speak the Target Language
I remember feeling frustrated when my daughter was clearly able to understand everything I was saying in French, and yet she only ever spoke in English. I read some really helpful advice online that said I should overtly ask her in French, “Can you say _______?” I started doing this with short, simple sentences, and while it took a while for her to want to start repeating them, she’s now keen to practise speaking French most days. It also took a long time for her to say anything spontaneous in French without parroting me, but now at the age of seven, she’s keen to show off what she knows. She regularly answers me in French even when I’ve spoken to her in English, which is lovely to see and hugely motivating for me to continue teaching French to my kids.
So, my advice would be to not put too much pressure on your child to speak the target language. The skill of listening and understanding comes first, and it can take a really long time for them to start saying even single words and simple sentences. This is true for children of both native and non-native speakers of the language. I would honestly say that the approach a parent takes to teaching a language to their child has far more of a bearing on success compared to whether the parent is a native speaker of the language or not.
Primary School: Formal Language Learning
Foreign language learning in state primary schools in the UK has not been a top priority for many years, and most children will only be taught very limited French, Spanish and possibly German for a maximum of an hour a week. Even half an hour a week is considered pretty good these days, and some schools have no foreign language provision at all. Essentially, UK state schools cannot be relied on to deliver adequate foreign language teaching, even if the second language being learned at home is one of the three ‘main’ languages, French, Spanish or German.
Therefore, as your child reaches primary school age, you might want to consider enrolling them in language courses or group classes outside of school. If they are willing, this is a good time to introduce more structured language learning, where they can learn the grammar and pronunciation rules of the target language. While parents who are native speakers of the second language are likely to prioritise formal learning of the language more than non-native speakers, any child who has exposure to a second language at home will benefit from formal lessons. If the child is resistant to having formal lessons, it is up to the parent whether or not to persevere or allow the child to continue learning the language in a more informal environment at home until they are older.
From Early Years to High School: Consistent Language Lessons
Consistency is key to language acquisition. As your child grows, try to ensure they have regular lessons or practice in the target language both in and outside of the home. This can be in the form of language classes, tutoring, and even through more creative ways such as online language exchanges with native speakers. If your child is reluctant, take the pressure off. Keep speaking to them in the target language daily and continue to gently encourage them to find ways of practising the language that don’t always involve you. If you have spoken the language to them regularly from a young age, you may find they suddenly become much more interested in mastering the language (written and spoken) when they’re older.
The Critical Period and Beyond
It’s important to note that the critical period for language acquisition is typically during early childhood, and the earlier you start speaking to your child in the target language, the better. However, that doesn’t mean it’s impossible to learn a new language as an older child, during high school or as an adult. Many high school pupils I taught French and Spanish to didn’t start learning those languages until Year 7 (age 11) or even later, and many went on to study those languages at university. It may require more time and effort, but it’s still possible to achieve a high level of fluency and grammatical accuracy both in the spoken and written language, especially if time is spent living abroad, fully immersed.
Incorporating the Different Cultures
Language is a reflection of culture. As you teach your child a non-native second language, take the opportunity to explore and appreciate the countries and cultures associated with that language together. You can celebrate different holidays, try new foods, and explore the customs and traditions of the language’s country/countries of origin. Your child will be more motivated to learn the language if they are also learning about real people who speak the language and their culture/s.
Our Own Experience: Learning from Non-Native Speaking Parents
Most non-native speakers of a language understand the fascinating journey and the joy of learning a foreign language. Passing the language on to your children may be challenging at times (certainly more challenging than a native speaker who only ever speaks that language to their child) but it can be incredibly rewarding. Your child’s bilingual journey can be a source of pride and joy for your family, enriching your lives in ways you may not have anticipated.
Conclusion
Teaching your child your non-native second language is not only possible but highly beneficial. Starting at a young age (as young as possible) and creating a consistent bilingual environment is the best way to ensure your child develops strong foreign language skills. Deciding to speak to my children in French when they were babies was one of the best decisions I made. While I’m not sure they will ever be completely bilingual in the way that children of native French speakers are, this really doesn’t matter to me. As well as practising my own French every day, I know that I’m providing my kids with a valuable skill that will serve them well at school, and I’m also opening their minds to exploring different cultures and ways of thinking. Given that we live in such a divisive world these days, this feels more important to me than ever.
So, whether you have a newborn or a teenager and are wondering whether to teach them your non-native foreign language, take that first step. Do it. Embark on this exciting and enriching adventure with your child and I promise you that they’ll be thanking you in the future.
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